Funny feeling leads to Iron Butt Rally on a Cosmopolitan

Since January, I've had a funny feeling in my gut about things. Today everything coalesced into a clear picture of what I had to do.

I managed to ride my Honda Valkyrie and Ducati Multistrada to a nearby Honda Motorcycle dealership and traded both on a Honda Cosmopolitan scooter. It was a tad more difficult than I anticipated straddling both bikes, especially given the differing seat heights. Working two throttles, the brakes, shifting gears presented their own set of problems. But I made it. I purchased a blue and white Cosmopolitan scooter like the one below.

I have given my two weeks notice and will be entering the next Iron Butt Rally covering 11,000 miles in 11 days. My calculus, which accounts for aerodynamic drag, Coriolis effect, and the gravitational pull of the moon, indicates I can cover the 11,000 miles with one 10-gallon tank of gas strapped to the rear luggage rack. I plan to keep Hostess Twinkies & Red Bull in the under seat storage compartment. In this way, I will not have to stop for gas or food. Presently, I am now training my body to so completely digest Twinkies that the only generated waste will be liquid. In this way, I will not have to stop for bathroom breaks.

I'm testing a satellite based Internet service provider and the not yet released iPhone 2.0 so that I can write blog posts on the road.

Give me a wave if you see me passing your home.